12 Week Scan

Well, where to start!
First of all the trip into Oxford was uneventful so that's always a good thing...
Got into the hospital car park, waited at the gate for a space to become available. A car then came out and we were allowed a ticket and went in. We went through the car park, found a space in the end - but my goodness, it was horrendous!

My appointment was for 11:30am.
We got there at 11:15am.
Worked our way around the hospital (a close friend came with me as the babies Father was unable to do so).

I bought a ultrasound ticket from the machine (£10) and took a seat. We were waiting well over an hour before I was finally called in..
A few details taken.
I led on the bed awaiting...

As soon as the probe went onto my belly we saw a white mass.
For a moment I did think 'where is the baby?'
She then found the baby. She advised me I have a fibroid. It is a fibroid tumour.


She measured the mass and it is 3cm and at the moment benign.
There is a 1 in 1,000 chance of it becoming malignant (cancerous).

Fibroids cause all sorts of problems (and certain explain my long standing issues):

- Reoccurring miscarriage
- Torrential bleeding whilst on my period
- Unexplained cycle pain

As many of you will know NHS Gloucestershire did an ultrasound in 2011 and then an operation to check for fibroids and found nothing, no PCOS or endometriosis - nothing.

My symptoms are long-standing so I find it incredibly hard to believe this (or they) have developed since the operation.

Anyway, I will take each day as it comes.
Chances are the fibroid will grow with the pregnancy (it thrives on estrogen, pregnancy hormones).
It may become so big it causes the baby problems (let's hope not).


Anyway, baby is still so small (the baby is as long as my little finger) and although Baby bond agreed with my ''due'' date, the NHS have persisted with their ''due'' date - there is only one day difference anyway, so I am not sweating it.


Anyway, baby was led on his/her back. Then decided to become a real poser and faced us. (Me and my friend believed the baby had turned its back to us!) Anyway, a bit of probing later and jumping on my bottom later - and the baby is back for a sideways shot again.
Measured, photographed and sent on my way.

 

And on other news, my ''Mother'' has blocked me on Facebook. 

Doesn't bother me much at all - she couldn't even be bothered with Duncan's birthday.
I think things happen for a reason and the pregnancy (though unexpected and a complete surprise) has happened to make us aware of the fibroid now I am fortunate to live in a better area with a hopefully better NHS. 

 

Jelly Beans Heart beat!

I won't lie, I've been part of a ''Due in'' group since I was 4 weeks pregnant.
I saw a lot of posts of people finding their babies heart beats at 8 weeks - 10 weeks.
I have since left this said group, it became apparent my vast knowledge about pregnancy and birth was not appreciated by all. Especially those who were ill advising and scare-mongering others.

Anyway, I proceeded to set up my own Due in 2014 group and Jelly Bean has it's own group for only my closest network of friends.

With 3 only okay-ish dopplers I decided to treat myself to a new one (with a more sensitive probe, only slightly) and I have been checking weekly from about 8 weeks for the heart beat, especially since the ultrasound picked it up lol.

Anyway, yesterday - 1st December morning, I found it!
I found it for only 5 seconds before the obviously awake and very active bean inside me shot off.
I listened in last night to see if I could send the Daddy an audio clip, bean was so active I was being kicked left, right and center!

Obviously, I am still way too early on to feel any movement but you physically hear it via the doppler, amazing!

Anyway, Monday morning, a school morning - no time for this!
However, this evening the boys have finally gone down to sleep.

I listened in, and within 5 minutes I found the bean!
Bean must be asleep because I was able to listen for about 5 minutes in total, he he.

Although I have posh dopplers with the BPM readout, the heart beat is still very weak to be picked up to trigger this reading, however - it did flash up this evening.

Based on the old wives tale (which was correct for both my twins), and the gender prediction I have already done, I am 99.9% sure I know the gender now.

Will find out after Christmas of course. Daddy doesn't want to know so it'll have to be a hush hush secret, which is no biggy because I am not telling the majority of you anyway, pahaha!

For those in the Jelly Beans group on FB, the video of the heartbeat is already up. Enjoy!

Dating Scan, Do I or Don't I?

Do I or Don't I go to the dating scan, decisions decisions...

FOR: Check baby is ok (Been under a lot of stress recently) and I know though I have passed the threshold I usually Miscarry, there is still that risk!

AGAINST: The NHS can use my ''due date'' against me lol. I may be noticed by the Obstetrician too (of whom I have been referred to but I shall not be seeing).

They can call me ''High Risk'' all they like, problem is - Since 2005 I took it upon myself to educate myself. It's a shame for my health care ''professionals'' that I know way too much about pregnancy and birth now to know what is genuinely necessary and what's not only a waste of my time and fuel - but unnecessary. My whole birthing page highlights what is not necessary and how much obstetricians interferer with the natural process of giving birth.

I am proud to sit here and say I have not had an interfered birth since 2004.
Never again do I let them pull my strings.
See how I feel nearer the time as to whether I go for the scan I reckon.

Hook On Effect [It's real!]

Explanation:
At the start of pregnancy our test lines are faint. Much fainter than the control line. As the pregnancy progresses, as does the strength of the test lines. At some point (Around 7-8 weeks) the test lines over power the control lines and become stronger in colour than the test lines.
However after this point the HCG levels are then TOO STRONG for the HCG tests. Weird right?

Here's the progression where the test lines over power the control lines:


IF you are as insane as me and worried about miscarriage OR you just can't believe you are pregnant and continue to test around or past the 8 weeks mark, please do not panic if your test line is faint, or has vanished completely!

Resolution:
IF you have a faint + or indeed a - and you are definitely pregnant, the trick is to DILUTE your pee. Your HCG levels are so high and in concentrated pee the tests just can't process that level of hormones.

I played with this theory last night.
Notice my concentrated pee sample was a faint line?
I then diluted it 50/50 and again, the control line still over powered the test line.
With 75% water and only 25% pee I finally got lines as dark as each other!



I hope this helps others who, like me continue to test for what ever reasons.

Early Scan

On the morning of the scan I was a complete mess. So tired from lack of sleep and so sick. I was sat on the toilet and had one second notice I was going to be sick. Thankfully the sink is right next to the toilet so I literally just turned my head and out it came. Disgusting!

Dave came to the scan with me.
He held my hand and supported me. We saw our little Jelly Bean and the baby looked very healthy. We saw the yolk sac and the heart beat. We even heard a trace of the heart beat.
Very excited and I have 3 photos of the baby.

Unfortunately my scanner / copier / printer decided to pass away peacefully so I now have a new printer / scanner / copier. I've already scanned in the photos and I will share one.
I have blurred out some personal sensitive information.
Mainly, the gestation because no one will be finding out the due date & my surname.

I am happy that there is only one Jelly Bean, please don't get me wrong - twins are a blessing, but with chronic illness and 5 children already I'm not sure I could manage another set of twins.


I am still yet to tell my parents (as is Dave to tell his parents) about the soon to be, new arrival.

I will now try to add some polls in the column ---> as to whether you think I am having a boy, or a girl, May even enter a poll as to birth weight guesses and when the baby will come EarthSide.

Booked in with the Midwife

Well I called in with the midwife yesterday, booked in.. Sure enough she has referred me to a consultant, diagnosis unit AND anesthesiologist.
Because sadly the twins resulted in a second caesarean the consultant will be pressuring me into a repeat caesarean.
He / she can pressure me all she / he wants. The Midwife can refer me all she wants too, I won't be going. I've been in that situation many a times before, bullied and pressured into doing what THEY want me to do. What's easiest for them etc.

I won't be going to the appointments (bar Midwife & scans)
I believe in my body, it's a shame they don't.

Because of my raised BMI the Midwife also wants me to have a GTT (glucose tolerance test) at 28 weeks. Since I refused yesterdays booking bloods she asked if I would let them do the GTT. I said, if there is glucose in my sample and any indications of GD (gestational diabetes) of course.

I am an educated woman who knows her rights and her own body. I don't agree to an unnecessary tests. Unfortunately for my midwife I know what's right and what's wrong. I can't and won't be pressured into anything.

Daddy will have to be tested to make 100% sure he does not have the same blood disorder trait as myself. 99% we should be okay because my blood disorder is RARE but it needs ruling out.

I won't lie, I am still in shock I have a baby inside me waiting to be born next year. I wasn't expecting it, heck - nor was my other half but I guess these things can be most beautiful when they are a lovely surprise. (D, if you're reading this, I'm still finding out the gender lol)

I have an ''Early Scan'' tomorrow in Swindon. I am a little over 8 ish weeks.
I have spent weeks really excited about the appointment, but unfortunately and this is new to me the Midwife documented all my miscarriages and made me go through it all again; regardless these things are on my medical records - for goodness sake.
It was incredibly hard and when she asked why I ''needed'' a caesarean for D (DS#1) I broke down in tears for a few minutes. I explained to the full of extent what I had been through but I also explained that his ''birth'' made me the woman I am today. It made me a strong woman, who believes in her body, knows her birthing rights, knows what's right and what's wrong.

Anyway, long story short - I am currently petrified of the early scan tomorrow. Bringing up all the miscarriages I suddenly remembered the purpose of this scan. I'd been focusing way too much on the 'Woo hoo we're going to see our baby' side of this scan. I'm now focusing on the real reason for the scan; to check the pregnancies viability.

I am hoping that since all my miscarriages have been very early on that I am now safe but you can't rule anything out.
I'm still a bit excited I can't deny it but I am more worried and scared of what we will see tomorrow.

As much as I love my twinnies, Please please please - let there be ONLY ONE in there. LOL!

Top Secret!

Things that will kept a secret from friends, family and blog readers:


Our ''estimated due date'' 
The only people to know our E.D.D will be the buffoons who make it up in the first place.
Of course, the Father and I will know but no one else will find out for sure when our due date actually is.
I do not believe in due dates (never have) so therefore I will refuse any inducement techniques (as always) and the baby will come when the baby is ready. I would NEVER allow anyone to set up an IV and induce me - EVER! 

The Birth
All I am going to reveal on this subject is that it WON'T be what you're all expecting from me.
The only people who will know about the birth we are having is the Father, myself and an extremely close local friend.

Names
The only people who will know the names will be myself and the Father.
Until the baby is born and delivered: no one will know the babies name.


Of course after the baby is delivered all information, photographs and birth story will be published (it may not be immediately as this is Mother / Father / Baby bonding time) but it will be published at some point.

Thanks for reading :)

 

Horrendous Heartburn

Well I must say I am again suffering with severe heart burn. However it hasn't helped with the hunger I have indulged in perhaps a few too many things I should be steering clear off to avoid such heart burn.

I am as good as 6 weeks pregnant.

I am still furiously testing, I don't really know why, For some silly reason I think that if one test has less dye on it, maybe its a sign I am going to miscarry again.
Which is stupid because we all know and I know from the past that even when I do miscarry the HCG levels are still extremely high until even after the miscarriage.

And this 3+ completes the set.....

These are the strips from the 3+ digi. Very strong lines :)

A Jelly Bean Expected :D

Amazing lines :)

Praying for a sticky sticky bean......

I made this image for everyone else like myself who is pregnant and surviving fibromyalgia.
It's incredibly difficult to be a single Mum, fighting Fibro and making a new human being.

Roll on Wednesday so I can get some rest; I am exhausted beyond comprehension at the moment.



It's also safe to say I am 99.9% certain I know what I am having. I shall be finding out at 16 weeks (as I do, lol) via a private Gender scan.

Dave does not wish to find out, therefore I shall not be telling ANYONE the result of the scan, just in case it gets back to Dave and spoils the surprise. That said, a CLOSE friend will be coming with me but she will be sworn to secrecy. :)

Another new addition to the Family

Another new addition has been added to the mad house.
A new car ;)

I have Peugeots coming out of my ears (Oh, if only!)
I have invested in yet another Peugeot 406 estate. This time I have gone for the ''top dogs bollocks' it is an Executive. It has all the toys don't you know. Not that Miss Pug was poorly equpit because, she wasn't. All I am saying is the 6 disk changer, cruise control, built in amp, heated electric seats are going to come in very very handy.

I have now worked out that any Peugeot I own (and being a snob, I have only ever owned Peugeot) I duplicate it. My white 205, then the grey 205. Blue 406, now black 406.
Next car upgrade I have to do a different model, lol.


Want me to show you some photographs of my TWO very very stunning Peugeots?


With pleasure :) :)

Took this photo on 21st October, in my local town.
I was driving around the car park, yuck do not wish to park next to the Renault, nor that Vauxhall.
Turned the corner to find these 2 series Pugs.
My absolute hero on the left, a stunning 205. On the right, it's predecessor, a 206.
In the middle, my new car :D

It's no secret Pugster came with a few 'dingly dangly' parts (His balls are practically on the floor, Okay!) so here is he, having the once over.

There is Miss Pug and Pugster. The happy couple.

Miss Pug will be removed from the road in a few short days and Pugster shall be having some MINOR work doing to him to pull his balls back up where they belong.

As a few of my blog followers won't actually realize, I do a lot of the work to my cars myself.
Miss Pug has been a troublesome tart at times, but I have not moaned (too much) I have just gone about my days with fixing what needs doing.

Miss Pug (Blue car) is a 2.0 16v petrol engine (EW10J4 RFN).
She is a light car, easily throw her into a roundabout not fearing your life.

Pugster (Black car) is a 2.2 HDi Turbo Diesel
He is slightly heavier than Miss Pug (noticeably so on the PAS), but to hear the turbo spool up.. and to smell diesel on my hands after 4 long years of selling my last Diesel car - oh bliss!

Blue car = Light, Fast but poor MPG
Black car = Heavy, Torque-y, better MPG!

So, Miss Pug has had the following done by myself since I bought her 6th December 2011:

- Rewired the passenger side seat belt pre-tensioner
- Replaced Rear Right ABS speed sensor (I had a little help with this)
- Replaced cylinder head cover gaskets
- Tinted all rear windows (rear done professionally)
- She's the 406oc PIMP CAR, has 3 406oc.co.uk stickers on her currently
- She has the rear lights fly tinted
- Replaced all 3 bulbs behind the MFD
- Replaced all windscreen wipers
- Replaced 1 x rear number plate lamp WITHOUT breaking the housing
- Replaced the battery
- Replaced the starter motor (with help, major job to get access)
- Put back a stray 16mm gearbox to engine mount bolt
- Refurbished rear wiper motor (with help)
- Fitted a brand new front o/s fog lamp
- Fitted a new factory stereo, later upgraded to an after market one
- Upgraded all door cards to beige leather
- In the process of upgrading seats to beige leather
- Adjusted handbrake
- Replaced rear o/s suspension link arm (with help, for MOT - Was the ONLY reason for a fail!)
- Sealed up the rear N/S lamp as it was letting water in (with help)
- Replaced pollen filter (with help)
- Replaced air filter
- Replaced slow fan relay
- Replaced spark plugs (with help)
- Replaced oil dipstick
- Replaced front number plate
- In the process of refurbishing 5 laser alloys

As you can see, I am very very hands on when it's focussing on my cars.
I don't need to bore you with any more car talk, I have a website set up specifically for the car talk I ramble on, ha ha!

Obviously now I am pregnant I am somewhat limited as to what I can and can not do on Pugster, but I still aim to do a few things myself. I never let anything stop me. :)

I am pregnant with #6!

So, I am pregnant.
I was testing from 9dpo with internet cheapies and got nothing but negatives - even though I had severe acid reflux in the evening, to the point where it was burning my throat and I was going to be sick!
Anyway, the day of my expected period arrived.
I thought just for the hell of it, use a clearblue digital.
It's one of those posh pregnancy tests where it'll tell you 'pregnant' or 'not pregnant' and then it'll go the extra mile to tell you how long ago it thinks you conceived.

Anyway, I was busy getting up and getting the boys ready for school.
 I peed on it. The hour glass set to work. It was working it out.

I got a few items of clothing on, the hour glass still working it's magic. As I prepared to glance away 'Pregnant' appeared.
I had to look again, no way. That said I was pregnant. The hour glass remained in motion, I put it down to a duff test.
After a minute or so, it decided I had conceived 1-2 weeks ago.
I am still in shock at the results. These tests are 98% effective. I had got so many negative tests before this - could this be real?

I did the school run, all be it in a bit of a daze.
I nipped down to a local pharmacy, bought a twin pack of a test and first response twin pack.
I asked the pharmacist for advice, took the test in.
Told her about the whole 'hour glass was still working when it said pregnant, surely it has to be a duff test?' thing.
Anyway, she said the digitals are extremely accurate and the reason the hour glass was still deciding is because it was deciding how far pregnant I was....

So, Many more tests later to confirm it - I am absolutely certain I am pregnant and expecting my 6th Child, though this child has a new Daddy.

Now, me being me I like to mess around with my tests - lol.
I decided to use an ovulation test to see what it would say.
The LH hormone (ovulation) is like a 'twin sister' in make up, compared to the HCG (pregnancy hormone).
With the twins, I did an ovulation test around 8 weeks by which time it was exceptionally strong.
I wanted to test early on to see the difference, would it pick it up? Would it be stronger than the pregnancy tests?

Green test strip - Ovulation test
Blue test strip - pregnancy test

As you can see, it picked it up BETTER. Weird and wonderful ways our bodies work huh?

When is my Expected Due Date (E.D.D)?
I will no doubtfully get asked this question billions of times during my pregnancy.
The only people who will know the babies ''Expected due date' is those who make up this nonsense in the first place.
Babies come when they are ready and certainly not when they are told to.

What are the plans for the birth?
Need you ask? I am planning my third home birth.
D = Elective caesarean
J = Home birth after 1 caesarean
M = Home birth after 1 caesarean
Twin M's = Emergency caesarean

This baby = Home birth after two caesareans (but also two home births).

All I am going to say is this birth will be a whole lot different.

A bit of background: (for my new friends & followers)
D's ''birth'' wasn't birth as I class it an operation. It was an 'uneccessarean' (unnecessary caesarean), he was breech presentated, with apparently low amniotic fluid levels and he was a HUGE baby, so a natural birth would brain damage him.
A trial of labour was not allowed.
D was born weighing 5lb 9oz.

J's birth was absolutely amazing, a home birth against medical advice. It empowered me. 100% I am the Mother of this baby and I chose what was best for my child, it's just a shame I couldn't do that with D. Anyway, he was born beautifully at home, despite death threats made towards us, we both were fine. I suffered a minor tear, for which I refused stitches. I had only gas and air, a water pool (for which only used for about half an hour then popped haha), and a tens machine.
J was born weighing a healthy 7lb 8oz, which was fitting as he was 11 days late.

M's birth was another absolutely amazing home birth, again against medical advice.
We had a few days stop / start labour. But when it got going she was born in 2 hours 49 minutes. At 9:05 I was examined and was ''only 4cm'' At 9:49am she was delivered and in my arms. The NICE guidelines recommend a Mother typically dilates 1cm every hour. I dilated 6cm in 40 minutes! 
M was born without anything, not even gas and air!
M was diagnosed as having a heart murmur at birth, a few months later down the line (and 3 days before her first Christmas) she was diagnosed has having a Congenital Heart Defect (CHD). She should of had it picked up during her antenatal scans.
Thankfully her home birth was another non-eventful birth and she was fine, things could of been different had she had a different CHD.

Twin M's birth was an emergency caesarean. We spent 3 days in labour with no progress. They were stuck plain and simple. I tried a lot of different holistic techniques to turn them to birth them naturally, but they were having none of it. Twin 1 was stuck, her shoulder was in my pelvis.
Even the surgeon had problems removing them from me.

After D's mishandled and traumatic ''birth'' I set upon myself to educate myself about the whole pregnancy, labour and birth thing.
I have experienced the trauma of birth rape and have experienced the 'dead eyes' following a caesarean now twice.
It's not just the trauma of the physical pain but the psychological ones too.
Feelings as strong as these do not go away.

I have always worn my babies, ok with D I knew no better and used a 'crotch dangler' I have always avoided medication where possible, and despite my wishes not being adhered to for D I had ordered ORAL vitamin K.
J, M and Twin M's have ALL had ORAL vitamin K and so will this new baby.

Why serve your newborn precious baby a NEEDLE OF PAIN, when there is a painless oral version?
Oral vitamin K is adminstered at home, by yourself on Day 1, Day 7 and Day 28.

I am a breast-feeder too. I didn't do well with D because of the caesarean and inexperience.
I did well with J, M and Twin M's - though I admit, to feed twins was extremely challenging.
I again will be breast-feeding. I strongly believe 'breast is best'. I support breast-feeding and advocate it as much as I do natural home birthing.

Because of M's CHD I will be having a 17 week foetal echocardigram with this baby (as I did with the twins) to rule out further Congenital Heart Defects, though I am sure since this baby was made using the finest sperm out there, there will be no issues - insert winky face here ;)

Upcoming dates for the calendar:

Wednesday 13th November - Booking in appointment with the Midwife
Saturday 30th November - Private Early Scan
Wednesday 11th December - NHS dating scan

As a few of you will know, I am the Administrator of a highly successful natural pregnancy and parenting page on Facebook.
I do what I believe to be natural and right.